Say What Now

Who Needs Cable When You’ve Got Life

I may not be the strongest one in the pool, but I have the most teeth.

I know but I don’t know.

We’re going down by the Dells to buy some fireworks with the Fibs, wanna come with or no?


Winter and exploding bottles go together like beer and ice cream.

Just wait till your father gets home. (Good, he always brings candy.)

You want me to pull this car over? (Yes, I have to pee.)

You didn’t get the correction form for the misspelling of your first name because we misspelled your last name in the email. (Charter)


If you swallow your gum it will grow into a tree. (A gum tree?)

Part of the beauty of me is that I am very rich. (Guess who?)

I hope I don’t have crabs I’m allergic to seafood.


If that dog lets another one she’ll break the ozone layer.

If that dog passes any more gas she’ll be declared a fossil fuel.

Sassy, recently classified as a biogenic gas

“it gets late early out here.” Yogi Berra, currently on Mallard’s sign.

“If idiots could fly, this place would be an airport.” The Old Man, Pawn Stars.